a song i wrote about Willy the Victorious Yet Fatally Injured Racehorse - no one liked the song when i performed it but it inspired the title of this tumblr, so everything worked out. Video by
It seems impossible that anybody on earth did not find this to be an instant classic, so I think I’m within my rights to call Ken a liar.
We walk the line.
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Photo: Kristen Somody Whalen
On my feet. Do you need my mailing address, or are you going to contact me, or what?
The Lingerie Saleswoman
"I look like crap, but I’m on my way~~"]]
"shit son my mom is turning my phone off tomorrow"
"But these are"
Sonic Brick (I can move my enemies to tears?)
"<3 <3 <3 <3"
Sonic Hair (?)
"Sorry I can’t be of more help."
"I should bring a big truck with a Canadian flag on it to France"
The Proctor? I HAVE LITERALLY NEVER SENT A TEXT IN MY LIFE. Uh, if we go by chats—“I love you too” ?
The Teacher "I’ll call at lunch. Love you."
OH NO I’M ADORABLE.
Sonic toilet paper. The Professor. “I’m home. I hope the burger was tasty.”
I think I just revealed too much about where I sometimes read tumblrs.
"Freestyle Rap Battle about butter" - Amy Poehler, Alan Thicke (aka. Paul F. Tompkins), Neil Campbell, Scott Aukerman from "Poehler Ice Caps", ep. #245 of Comedy Bang Bang
Poehler and Campbell come in at the end, but it’s super worth the wait.